Like many individuals, the ritual of a coffee in the morning is borderline necessity for me and it is also one that i look forward to each and every day. Now there are many reasons for this, the foremost being that the coffee is excellent and the others largely relating to the attractiveness of the waitresses. The occasional hot customer comes in as well which is yet another perk and this is where the origin of this mix-tape lies.

Browsing the net as I usually do particularly considering I have no friends, or social network that doesn’t consist of ones and zero’s I had another realization that is so startling you probably should sit down to read this, (who the hell stands up whilst using a computer anyway?). Everyone online (particularly in regards to blogging) has become complete and utter pansy’s too afraid to say no, and completely unable to remove their head from each others asses. I have a theory that if the most popular bloggers began preaching the world is flat, there would be some boats falling off the edge of the world, and low level bloggers everywhere saying “I told you so”.

One of my favorite bloggers, Daniel Scocco from dailyblogtips.com sent me an email with the above subject line. Unfortunately the link Daniel provided was to his new website which is targeted toward new webmasters setting up a website and to be frank, lacks substance. This lackadaisical approach towards a mailing list raises some interesting point for me, Daniel, George W Bush, the Inuits, and anyone else who currently has a mailing list.

So it seems the internet has judged me and emphatically judged me as someone not worth listening too. Of course I am referring to my distinct lack of RSS subscribers to this blog. Before you say anything, I am well aware that its not my fault that there is a lack of subscribers, it must be a simple tip, or piece of code that I am not implementing properly. So knowing this I have launched this series in a quest to find out the issue that is handicapping my exponential growth in subscribers and popularity.

If you are not sure who Paul the psychic Octopus is, you must be living under a rock, and this rock must not be located in a small aquarium in Germany. In which case I will treat you with compassion for your unbelievable levels of ignorance and post a link to a video of Paul in action below.

I know it somewhat ironic (or perhaps it should be hypocritical) for a socially reclusive human being such as myself to be commenting on social conventions and social networks. But believe it or not, I actually have a facebook account and have more than 1 friend on it. This makes me infinitely more popular than George W Bush and puts me in a unique perspective to comment on this social phenomenon or abnormality.

As a blogger I aim to reach the dizzying heights that some bloggers have achieved. Bloggers like Yaro Starok and Darren Rowse who make a comfortable living doing what they love and whose knowledge of all things blogging can never be questioned. But how is it possible for the average blogger to achieve success when they can’t honestly say they are the most knowledgeble person in thier niche. In fact there are probably hundreds of people who contain more knowledge in thier niche so why would anyone care about what they have to say?

Did you here the internet is a big place? In fact it is a really, really big place, way bigger than Texas. My friend Kevin is going to go through every single page to make sure there is no naughty stuff for kids to see. He estimates it will take a few weeks but according to Bing, reading every page on the internet is estimated to take 6 million years with over one trillion web pages in existence. So while Kevin prays for some serious advances in medical technologies and the fact that the internet will not have a single change for the next 6 million years, I can’t help but think how easy it would be for internet users to not see my website (despite how awesome it obviously is).

This is an extract from wikipedia: “Steven Paul “Steve” Jobs (born February 24, 1955) is an American business magnate, and the co-founder and chief executive officer of Apple and known turtle neck wearing tool that produces closed off electronics that have more faults then a tennis match, but inexplicitly still has a rabid fan base that rival star wars fans (or possibly the fans are one and the same) and hails him, and his products as some sort of enlightened entity, worthy of spending freezing nights in the cold to get the first copy of what will most likely be a faulty product”.

I was going to wear a wig, and post something on youtube but as per usual my lethargy has stopped my creative juices from flowing. So instead I am going to post my social observations here where about 2 people will actually read it, but in my mind the whole world will see it. It is in relation to the latest social networking scandal about a paedophile “grooming” children for sex. Now not even I am going to make jokes about paedophilia, I wouldn’t touch that with a ten foot pole (and no that’s not some sort of sly pun, you sick individual).